What is Normal?

April 19, 2012

I haven't written for a couple weeks... tax season, you know.  Still double dosing twice a week - waiting for some momentous to happen.  But what is it they say about the Tortoise and the Hare?  Slow and steady wins the race - must have patience.  I am gradually feeling somewhat back to normal, whatever that is.  

Interesting to Google:  What is Normal?  Found a lovely quote which made me feel better: 
 "It is often relatively healthy people who feel defective"... 

Now that taxes are done, I can focus on what I'm feeling... do I feel defective? 

Interesting question... I'm going to NOODLE that and let you know.

But more than seeking normalcy, I seek C.A.L.M.

I found a wonderful article:  "How to Have a Calm Life."  

One thing in particular really stuck out: 

 "If you know what bothers your life, 

remove it before you proceed further."  

 Somehow I doubt they were talking about husbands.

At least I've graduated from screaming... 

to making sarcastic remarks... 

to making those remarks under my breath... 

to just rolling my eyes and leaving the room... 

small steps for womankind, giant leap for me!

Is Amberen the reason for these changes?

Moods are Leveling Off

April 5, 2012

I'm taking double doses only every other day... tapering back down to once daily by next week.  My moods have officially leveled off.... ahhhh.  Even when the "man in the chair" frustrates me, I can limit myself to a simple EYE-ROLL rather than a tongue lashing.  Was surprised to lose a couple pounds... but I also gave up bread products which could be the reason!    I'm sleeping well... well... at least soundly, when I DO sleep!  Getting myself to bed is a problem - but by the time I get there, I conk right out.  I used to wake up every night at 2:30 am for some reason - but am sleeping through that midnight alarm clock now... thank goodness!  Maybe by the time I reach the end of this decade I will have this stuff under control.  

The stuff our mother's don't tell us... 



OH YEA!  I joined the YMCA!  My "man in the chair" gets discounts through his work that we were unaware of all these years... Now... to find a good sports bra!  Any suggestions?  

PS - not sure who to give original credit for the cartoons.  Seems they are on a lot of blogs about menopause... nice to know I'm not alone!

I Just don't Care Anymore...

March 28, 2012

I'm taking a double dose every other day now.  I'll taper back down to once daily soon.  Sleep has been interrupted due to a new device I am testing out.  But hopefully I'll be used to it by next week... No weight loss (but no gain either).  I still feel ADDish... but that could be attributed to the season (tax)... My MOOD feels better and better every day.  I don't get so upset when husband says something profoundly stupid.

  
I found a very interesting article today on the Amberen Facebook page:  Huffington Post: Will Your Marriage Survive Menopause?   This quote really jumped at me:
During menopause a woman's brain also goes through changes. Dr. Louann Brizendine (author of The Female Brain) says, "The mommy brain unplugs. Menopause means the end of the hormones that have boosted communication circuits, emotion circuits, the drive to tend and care, and the urge to avoid conflict at all costs."

The whole article is interesting - but this quote... BAM!  Sometimes I just don't CARE anymore!  I actually noticed this feature of motherhood leaving me, and was a little worried about it.  I don't CARE as much as I used to... I don't want to FIX things as much as I used to.  I don't care if I offend or upset "the husband in the chair"...

There it is in black and white.  I'm not the only one. There is a literal brain-thing that happens.  THE MOMMY BRAIN UNPLUGS!  Who knew?  I remember when my mother must have started this phase.  She would say, "I have to go now dear,"  right in the middle of my crisis!  I wish she were here so I could share this revelation with her...  Thankfully I have this blog to share it with... Has anyone else noticed their Mommy Brain Unplugging?  Am I the only one who will admit it feels kind of nice?  

Feeling a little frisky!

March 20, 2012

WOO HOO... I'm feeling goooood... even a little frisky!  (A good night's sleep doesn't hurt either.)  One more week of doubles and I'll taper back... wonder if I could take them every other day to save some coinage?  Will have to noodle that one...   My weight gain is scaring me... and I am going to double up on my exercise routine... let's see... two times nothing equals nothing... I guess I'll have to ADD instead of multiply!   The Amberen commercials focus a LOT on the "loss of belly fat" - maybe if I stick with it, things will start happening in that arena as well...  I'll check in next week, unless something miraculous happens in the meantime...

Starting Double Dose

March 13, 2012

Popped four of those puppies this morning... let's get this going!

Jury is Still out

March 11, 2012

The jury is still out... I think I'll double up for a week to kick things into gear a little faster.  I did that the first go around, and it seemed the help.  I'm not 100% convinced anymore... but now I'm afraid to stop.  I do feel somewhat calmer, and it is tax season, where crazy is the norm... and I haven't fallen apart completely.  Oh don't worry... I'm not giving up, but I'm also going to ask the doctor about some other issues... like a possible never-diagnosed ADHD personality.  I tried an Adderall, just to see if it would help, and the C.L.A.R.I.T.Y. and C.A.L.M was beyond my wildest dreams... maybe this is all about an issue I've had since childhood, and not hormones at all.. or a combination of both... who knows anymore.

I did read that some women only do this 90-day cycle of Amberen twice a year. I hope that after I can "kick into gear" that maybe I can take one every other day or so... I'm just trying to find ways to stay balanced, but also stay on a budget!    It hasn't even been a month yet, so I'll just keep plugging away... I'm just so impatient!

By the way... someone asked me if I was affiliated with AMBEREN - NO I AM NOT!  I am just a crazy menopausal woman who heard about it on a Dr. Laura commercial!  There are so many testimonials FOR and AGAINST the product.  This is just my little personal journey which I wanted to share with anyone who happened to stop by to read it... I hope I am not stepping on any copyright toes by doing this... 

Back to 35%

March 2, 2012

Another week... My Amberen Life is still not completely back - but maybe at 35%... my physical health is at 80% - still coughing a little... but the weather is 100% beautiful!  I was able to let something roll off my back, which would have sent me into a tailspin a few weeks ago.  I might still bitch to my girlfriends, but am able to let it go and maybe even just giggle a little.   I could double up on the dosage, like I did in the first round to get things going, but I'm being a cheap-skate and trying to ration them.  I wish I could take one every other day - but I'm going to wait awhile to do that.  It's only been a couple weeks, but I'm so impatient.  I'll keep plugging away... crossing my fingers... hoping these were not a waste of money...

Got a Little Flu Bug

February 24, 2012

Hard to tell after one week of being back on them.   I also came down with some flue - cold - fever - whatever thingy with my granddaughter, and being sick kind of hinders my "research."  I had a huge blowout with my husband a few days ago, but the fever came the next day.  Can't necessarily blame that on hormones...  Drinking tea while I'm sick helps also... always soothes the soul.  Anyway... after this fever leaves the premises, hopefully I'll know more, and be able to report some GOOD NEWS...

I just realized that even though I was sick, I was able to stay awake until midnight (tons of year end accounting work to complete) with NO coffee... NO caffeinated tea... and only one Diet Coke.  Was it the Amberen?   Who knows... it could be that the return of KISN to the internet airwaves gave me a second wind.  Whatever it is... it was great!  I'm sure I pay the price tomorrow... but it was fun while it lasted! 

Started on my Second 90-Days

February 17, 2012

First day of 2nd round of 90 days on Amberen.  I want my moods to level out immediately, but it will probably take a few days.  Mentally I feel better - knowing that relief is around the bend. We shall see...

My doctor doesn't want me to eat, or take ANY other pills at the same time as my Synthroid - so I have to figure out how to remember to take those first, then wait an hour to take my Amberen with food.  Such a pain... I don't know how my diabetic husband keeps track of everything!   I only have four little pills and have to rearrange my life to figure it out!  Thyroid alone at 6:30 am... then at 7:30 I can take my heartburn, allergy meds, and Amberen.  I think these stupid daily reminder thingies will help.  I swore I would never have them.  I'm officially an old lady.

Relief is in the Mail

February 16, 2012

I am tracking my package every five minutes on the USPS website, now that I know my little orange and white pills are on their way.  I'm so incredibly anxious to get started again!   I feel like I need some ADD medication... some anti-anxiety meds... some sleeping pills... and caffeine... and I know that my  RELIEF is spelled:  A M B E R E N!  Please please Mr. Postman... hurry... hurry... hurry! 

9:25 pm - just went to the mailbox and it was there!  I'm so anxious to get started... I feel like an addict.  Do I take it tonight, or wait until the morning?  I wonder if it would keep me awake to start in the evening... Patience Debbie... just wait until the morning... then wait for the blissful relief to take affect. 

Why am I so skeptical?

February 14, 2012

Happy Valentine's Day... I hate this day... but luckily the sale is still going on because of it.  I procrastinate everything, including my order of this product.  Why have I waited?  It's only been three weeks... and I'm convinced that it was doing something - so why am I still so skeptical?  I still read other blogs and comments (good and bad) about it.  It seems to work for some, and not for others.  It worked for me.  it is only $1 per day - what is my problem!  Pick up the phone!

Moodiness is back

February 7, 2012

Baby Boomer Musicals

I haven't made the call - was hesitating due to the cost.  My hubby complained about it not being covered on our insurance until yesterday.  Anxiety... panic... scatterbrainie-ness... fatigue... MOODINESS.  They are all re-entering my being.  But yesterday I was a raving maniac!  When my husband asked what was wrong, I screamed, "My AMBEREN is wearing off!"  He responded, "ORDER MORE NOW!"  I still wish it was a little cheaper, but I will just consider giving up my daily Circle K $1 drink - fair trade, eh?  I did find a special for Valentine's Day.  Not much (14%) but every little bit counts! Amberen 14% Valentine Special

Onward and upward!  Maybe if I add exercise to my daily routine, the weight will come off this time?  Exercise... ya think?

Withdrawals taking a toll

February 4, 2012

I am already feeling changes from being OFF of Amberen, the biggest being anxiety.  I have not felt anxious since I started this journey - something I hadn't really noticed until it returned - and I don't like it.  "Desires" that were starting to rumble have quickly waned.  Lethargy... which could be from sleeplessness.  MOOD SWINGS - horrible mood swings... and I think I even had a hot flash yesterday - what the heck!  Also notice concentration issues... I feel like I am struggling with ADD - (which I probably do suffer from) - but the symptoms seem more pronounced since being off the product.  

Had my Thyroid levels checked this week, to make sure that wasn't the cause, and they are fine.  Could Amberen really be making such a difference?   It will be worth the $1/day if it is true... and my husband can't complain about the cost, if I remind him of the cost of his diabetic supplies!  If this can make me tolerable to live with... 

I think I'm going to call them today!   Of course, the bargain hunter side of me will do some research first, to see if there is a cheaper way to get them... Why don't I think I'm worth this?  That's a whole other chapter, right ladies?

I guess it's time to break down and buy one of those daily plastic pill containers...  ugh

First 90 days almost over...

January 17, 2012

My 90 days are almost over.  Received an email from customer service, reminding me that it was time to order my next supply.  I reminded THEM that this was supposed to be a temporary thing (or so I thought!)  I was supposed to see if my body reverts back, then try it for only one more 90 day session.  They originally told me if it didn't work after two tries, it wasn't going to work for me.  I will give my body a rest from this and see what happens, and make a decision in a few weeks.


So... what HAS happened in the past 90 days?  For those of you not producing estrogen, you know what happens... and some of "that" seems to be kicking into gear a little bit!  I have a little "desire" peaking through the clouds, and possibly some internal issues resolving themselves.  Feels good to feel feminine again... BUT - I haven't lost an ounce of weight - instead, I have GAINED 10 pounds!  Very frustrating, to say the least.  Their commercials focus on that the most!  The women calls her friend all excited about her "belly fat" going away.  Well... mine remains.  

That wasn't my biggest issue when I began this adventure, although I had high hopes.  So it remains to be seen what my body will do next few weeks.  If I start getting hot flashes again, I will scream!  I would be willing to try one more 90-day session - it would be worth the $100 IF IT WORKS!

I will check in again at the end of February to let you know if I'm placing another order.  I know I'm being vague about the desired results...  email me privately if you want specifics (addiedebkins@gmail.com) - but if you are menopausal, I think you understand...

Continuing on Double Dose

December 9, 2011

10 days on the double dose (two reds, two whites) ---  no more weight gain at least!  Maybe things are starting to work inside of me.  I may keep taking the double dose for a few more days.  The original dosage is a double dose... but they had suggested I start out with just one (thyroid concerns).  As long as it isn't going to give me a heart attack, I'm fine...

My thyroid levels were a little high this week, which could account for the weight gain.  I get off kilter quite often - Doc doesn't blame the Amberen.  When my levels are high, I sleep all day and rapidly gain weight - when they are too low I am a cleaning tornado!  The weight comes on so quickly, and takes forever to go away... you know the drill... 

I'll keep on doubling down for awhile longer...

Started Double Dose

November 30, 2011

Called their Nurse Hot line to let them know about my weight gain (another five pounds - which could be attributed to pumpkin pie - I know I know) and she suggested I double the dosage for 10 days to kick things into gear.  I suppose it is worth the money to keep trying another month.  I would still get some back if I return the last month supply - but I SOOOO want this to work for me!  

Jury is still out...

November 12, 2011

Well - the jury is still out on this "wonder drug" - I have gained 5 pounds.  I feel a little more energetic during the day, so maybe that's something.  I can actually make it through without a nap - I will give it a little more time... 

In the beginning

October 12, 2011

Amberen is something I've wanted to try for quite awhile.  It is natural ingredients, not a hormone supplement, that supposedly helps your body kick itself into gear.  When I looked into it a few years ago it seemed very expensive - I wasn't willing or able to spend more than $20 on anything back then.  I forgot about it for a long time, suffering in silence (my family might disagree with the silent part) until I heard it on Dr. Laura last week.  Now... Dr. Laura is not on my regular list of favorite radio shows, but she happened to be on, and mentioned Amberen, which triggered my menopausical memory gland.  I called, but this time I'm in a different mind frame, and asked questions to which I listened to the answers.  

This time the price seemed reasonable, considering I am desperate for a solution!  The first month is free, when you purchase a 90 day supply.  But it is only a 90 day program - so $100 for three months seemed OK at this point in my life.  So... we shall see. I'm concerned that it will drive my Thyroid Wacky, but "they" say it won't. There is a nurse line you can call with questions, which made me feel better.  Of course, who knows if they are registered nurses on the other end of that line... but at least I could understand them! (That sounded bad.)  The goal is that your body will utilize the minerals properly and "kick start" itself during that 90-day period, and that you shouldn't have to do it again. After 90 days, you go off the pills for the next 90 days and see if your body is still working.  If you need to do a second round of three months you can, but after that, if it doesn't work they recommend you NOT continue, that it just isn't for you. 

So... when they didn't try to talk me into a "lifetime payment plan" of $49 per months forever, I was willing to try it!  I will talk to my regular doctor as well, but the ingredients seem fine... of course, you never know. I hope that maybe it will work, even if it is just my brain kick-starting everything. If I BELIEVE, right? I BELIEVE... I BELIEVE.... I BELIEVE... oh wow... I already feel 30 pounds lighter!  It's all that fairy dust... http://www.bestsupplementsforwomen.org/go/Amberen.php